Between today and my last post, it's been 3 months! I have visited Montego Bay, Jamaica… Toronto, Canada… Condado, Puerto Rico… London, UK… and La Habana Vieja, Cuba… to name a few. I have also relocated to Chicago, IL from Dallas, TX. A lot has transpired during my hiatus. And as much as I will continue pursue consistency on this blog, I definitely needed to hit the reset button.
I notice on youtube that when a "personality" becomes more popular and eventually becomes sponsored by brands, they start to lose authenticy. They're still entertaining, but sometimes, they lose their purpose and edginess. While my audience isn't that large yet, Curls & Carryons was starting to feel more like a commodity than a safe space to upload my experiences.
So yea… I took a few months off to recharge, live, and refocus. I never stopped writing though. Its in my blood. My mom writes, my father writes. There's even a little old French writer named Anais Nin whom I naively discovered at eight years old. "Mom, she has my name!! I have to buy her book!" Come to find out, she wrote exotica and my childish mind quickly lost interest in the adult subject after about 30 pages. I left the book on my shelf though just to stare at my name on the hardback's spine, hoping one day it would actually be written by me.
In the few months I was away, I thought a lot about my motivating values and what I wanted my impact to be on this platform. As previously stated, I started Curls & Carry-ons to share my pain and triumphs in hopes that others could relate. Fear eventually set in and I shared less of my heart and more of my travels. While traveling has been exhilarating and therapeutic, writing "A Curly Girl's Guide to the World" doesn't interest me. What has interested me my entire life has been truth, love, peace and how those three values intersect with the human condition. Consistently, those that have gone up against any of my core three values have been removed from my life, either by God or by me. I intend to impact even just one person, through these values, the way Anaïs Nin impacted me. She spilled her secrets and valued her truth above all. She was fearless.
Yet, it can be so intimidating to hear of so many people reading your thoughts, theories, truths. Yes, the girl who always wanted to be published shied away from the attention that came with being published online. Though I am still building an audience, the people who do subscribe to Curls & Carryons are so important to me. All the feedback and encouragement has been invaluable. People are READING MY THOUGHTS! That, in itself, is so profound.
If your truth was meant for even one person to hear and you never shared it aloud, you do even that one person an injustice. You hurt that person. You destroy your purpose. Its like never leaving the house for fear you may be struck by lightning. A fearful life is not a life worth living. This is step 1. If I'm overwhelmed, I'll take a break, but I won't quit!
Thanks for joining me 😘